


A Realization, A Reunion, and the Foundings of a Life

by faghalforc



Category: Black Sails
Genre: Feelings Realization, Healthy Communication, I have no idea what to tag this as, Implied Sexual Content, John Silver Realizes He's Bisexual and Has a Bit of a Crisis When He Sees Him Again, Multi, Polyamory, Post-Season/Series 04, Talking, also thomas and madi become close friends and talk so much and i love them, i would have written the secks but no heart emoji so just imagine it was incredibly emotional, john prolly cried or some shit but its all okay because they love him, madi is a great wife i love her so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26472343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faghalforc/pseuds/faghalforc
Summary: It had been almost a year since the war came to its sudden end. Madi had forgiven him, and their relationship was finally in a good place again. So it was quite a shock to John Silver when, laying in bed with his wife after another day of long emotional discussions, he finally realized.“I think I was in love with him.”
Relationships: Captain Flint | James McGraw/John Silver, Captain Flint | James McGraw/Thomas Hamilton, Captain Flint | James McGraw/Thomas Hamilton/Madi/John Silver, Madi/John Silver, Thomas Hamilton/John Silver
Comments: 4
Kudos: 38





	A Realization, A Reunion, and the Foundings of a Life

**Author's Note:**

> thought too much abt john and his stupid deep closet and how he wouldn't even be ABLE to SEE he was in love with james until a WHILE after the end of the series and i started talking about THIS concept so yeah here take it

It had been almost a year since the war came to its sudden end. James Flint was long gone, hidden somewhere far away with his not-dead lover. Madi had forgiven him, and their relationship was finally in a good place again. So it was quite a shock to John Silver when, laying in bed with his wife after another day of long emotional discussions, he finally realized.

“I think I was in love with him.”

Madi stilled for a moment, before turning in his arms to face him. Her hands swept over his face, brushing curls out of his eyes. “I know,” she murmured.

Silver reached for her wrist, stopping her movements. “You… You knew?” His lungs were empty. “How… How long have you known— why didn’t you ever say anything?” He felt his eyes stinging.

“My love.” Her hand curled in his grasp until he was clutching her palm. “It was a truth you needed to come by on your own.”

His hand left hers and he sat up, resting his elbows on his knee and digging his hands into his hair. She pushed herself up, the bedsheets pooling at her waist. She didn’t know whether her touch would be a comfort to him at that moment, so her hands stayed at her sides. “Are you alright, John?” She asked, voice low in the night hour. “Do you want to see him again?”

Silver barked a laugh. “How could I? God knows where he is, he and _Thomas_ , mind you.” He shook his head. “I don’t even know if he’d want to see me. I destroyed ten years worth of his life.”

“You also gave him his love back,” Madi reminded him, moving closer to him and brushing his hair from his neck lightly and kissing his shoulder. “I could always speak to Max. She would help us find him.” 

John turned to her, eyes a storm of emotions. “Do you think so?”

Madi nodded. “Now come, try to get some sleep.”

John moved to her, laying on his side again. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and he around her waist, and they drifted to sleep curled around each other.

* * *

It only took a month or so for Max to find where James and Thomas were staying. Her connections as one of the most powerful people on this side of the world were quite helpful in the matter. When Madi left with the directions, Max kissed her cheek, and told her to be careful.

While traveling, Silver’s thoughts swung between _I need to see him_ now, _no matter what his feelings toward me,_ and _What are we doing, I’m intruding, he won’t want me there_ , over and over again, despite Madi’s assurances. A few times she thought his horse had rolled her eyes too, but she tried to simply comfort the man instead of adding to his worry.

The journey took them a few weeks, but they finally stood there, twenty paces from the front step of James and Thomas’ home. It reminded her of his other home, the one she’d nearly died in a year ago.

“I can’t do this, Madi,” Silver said. Madi finished tying their horses to the post before cupping his face in her hands.

“You will be alright. The worst he can do is send us away.”

“The worst he can do is stab me!”

Madi shook her head. “I doubt it will come to that, my love.”

“Cut off my head, slash my throat— worse, do something to you just to get back at me—”

Madi breathed a heavy sigh. “You need to _talk_ to him. He is not an irrational man.” However much she believed that was not the point. She clutched his free hand and led him to the door.

It only took a dozen moments from when she knocked for the door to be open. There James stood. His hair was longer, his eyes brighter, and he seemed well rested for the first time since she met him. His eyes sparked with recognition, and she smiled, glad to see him. And then his face dropped into terror.

“Madi… Where is he, please tell me you haven’t come to tell me he—”

Madi’s eyes flared, “No! No, he’s fine, he’s fine, he—” She looked around behind her, he was nowhere to be found. “Oh good god, he’s probably just panicking around the corner.”

She and the redhead made their way down the old wooden steps and around the corner of the house to where he was, leaning heavily against the wall, crutch pulled to his side, breath laboured. He felt their eyes on him and slowly turned toward them.

James’ gaze immediately softened, taking in the tear-reddened eyes and the panic in his chest. He breathed out a weary sigh. He reached out to the other man, taking his hand gently, and led him inside into the cool of the house.

“James? Who was at the door—” Thomas said, wiping his hands on a rag as he exited what must have been the kitchen. His eyes took in the scene, his husband holding the hand of a man with one leg, and a young black woman helping him sit on their sofa. His hands paused, still holding the rag, and he looked at James questioningly as he turned from the strangers.

“Right,” James breathed, “Thomas, this is Madi—” He gestured to the woman, who nodded in acknowledgement of them. “— And… John Silver. Madi, Silver, this is Thomas.” He gestured to Thomas before breezing past him, presumably to fetch their guests some water, leaving Thomas to take in the people anew. James had told him of Madi, the intelligent equal he had found on the Maroon island, who aided him most prominently in their war effort, a warm spirit with whom he had shared many similarities, he held a great fondness for her, he’d said. And John Silver… Thomas knew of John Silver. James had spoken of him much, in the early days of his recounts of the years they were apart, but also since then. Thomas would say something, usually teasing or biting, and James’ face would go far away, somewhere Thomas could not follow, but he knew this man was behind it all.

“You’ve traveled a long way, I just put bread in the oven, please,” Thomas spoke to the two of them gently, “Stay for supper.” Madi nodded, but Silver seemed frozen on the sofa, clutching at its arm. Madi pet at his hair, a hand resting on his shoulder. Thomas could feel the love radiating off of her towards the man on the couch, and it made him feel warm in his chest. He only hoped that he and James radiated the same.

When James returned with water, Thomas moved back into the kitchen to finish preparing the meal, taking out two more bowls from the cupboard. He could hear Madi and James speaking in the other room, but not quite make out what they were saying. Silver never seemed to speak a word.

“In short,” Madi said, standing at the arm of the sofa, “He’s had a… personal realization and wanted to see you.”

James was now sitting on the coffee table in front of Silver. His brows furrowed at Madi’s words, and he turned to Silver, but the man was still frozen. His eyes darted all over him, overwhelmed that he was seeing the man before him. James turned back to Madi questioningly.

She sighed. “He’s realized that he loved you.” Silver flinched below her. “Which, you and I already knew, but—”

Silver jolted in her grasp, whipping around to look at her with wide eyes. _He knew too?!_ his eyes asked her. She smiled pityingly down at him, petting at his curls. John slowly moved back to his previous position, curling in on himself a bit. Madi felt bad for him, she probably could have been more delicate with her words, but seeing as he wasn’t currently able to speak, and words were needed, she’d been forced to speak for him. And, when it came to these men, delicacy had never been her forte.

James was searching the man seated in front of him with his eyes. His gaze seemed so far from those he’d shared with him before. So much lighter, unburdened. Happy, even, which Silver could hardly say he’d ever seen him truly be. At least not this openly. The light from the late evening sun that traveled through the windows lit his face beautifully, highlights in orange and the freckles on his cheeks.

Thomas came out of the kitchen holding a tray and placed it on the dining table. It held four bowls of stew and some fresh bread. He looked at the scene in front of him and nodded at Madi. She nodded back, and he placed two bowls on the table, before taking the tray to the front door, Madi following him outside to give them some privacy.

The two men sat in silence for a while, knees touching — well, knee and stump — until James broke the silence. He offered the cup of water out to John, who didn’t move.

“Take it and drink, or I’ll make you,” James joked, a smirk on his face reminiscent of those he’d shared before. Silver broke into action, taking the cup and drinking it down in one go. James raised his eyebrows. Silver tried not to think about the way their fingers had brushed when he’d taken the cup. Tried not to think about how this man felt so far from the man he’d known, how this was the McGraw side of James, could he love him like this too?

James seemed to understand that there were many thoughts running through John’s head, and he asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

The question hit Silver to his core, and he immediately wanted to leave. He stood up, even, his crutch at his side immediately, but James was faster, hands on his shoulders, speaking softly.

“Hey, hey, hey,” He cooed, “It’s alright.” He smiled deprecatingly, “Unlike near every other instance we’ve been together, this place? Is safe.”

That got a breath of laughter from Silver, before he realized he’s leaning into James’ hands on his shoulders, and how do you tell a man you’re in love with him, and have been for a while but only recently realized, especially when that man is James Flint, and he has a husband, and you have a _wife_ , and— 

James sat him down on the sofa and followed him. John tried not to think about the way their sides were pressing together, as James looked off into space for a moment.

“If you’re wondering,” James spoke, “I also developed strong feelings for you.”

John wanted to scream, but his mouth was glued shut. Instead, he just jerked his head to look at James, who began laughing at his shock.

“Silver…” He chided, smiling brightly, “What did you think when I told you about Thomas? We spoke explicitly about how you and he share almost the exact same role in my life.”

Silver was reeling. Taking in the information that not only Madi, but James both knew of his feelings for him, and that they were returned? And James had tried to imply so? His breathing picked up, and James stood.

“Come,” He said offering his hand. Silver took it, tucking his crutch under him for support. “You and Madi can stay in the guest room tonight. I’ll show you where.” And James led him to a room near the back of the house.

Left alone, John’s most prevalent thought was that this house reminded him deeply of the one Miranda had inhabited. The walls were of similar material, and the layout too. He wondered if, by wandering around and poking through things, he could find the painting of Thomas and her again, only to remember about the fire.

Madi came in what could have been an hour or a few minutes later, his forgotten bowl of stew in one hand and a cup of water in the other. She placed them on the side table before sitting down next to him, resting a hand on his good leg.

“Are you alright?” she spoke softly.

All he could do was close his eyes, and hope that spoke for him. She seemed to understand.

She kissed him gently on the cheek, and nodded to the stew. “Eat, I’m going to get dressed for bed, my love. Once you’re done, you can do the same.”

So Silver ate and drank, and got dressed for bed, and when the lights were all out and the moonlight danced on her features, he watched his wife sleep soundly. How could she be in support of this? Did she want to offload him to James? _No,_ he said firmly to himself, _she wouldn’t want that. She loves me, as I love her, and nothing can come between that._

_Except for the thing that did once._

_Except for the_ man _that tried to._

He tried to rationalize with himself, that James hadn’t been trying to get in between them, had just had his own agenda, if Madi weren’t Madi he would have done the same.

And due to this train of thought he realized: had Flint and Madi’s positions been switched, those days when Madi was captured…

He would have made the exact same choices.

* * *

The next few days were arguably some of the hardest days of Silver’s life. And he’d had to betray and lose the two people he cared about most just to keep them alive.

Still finding himself unable to speak, he found himself mostly observing Flint and Thomas. He would sit on the outside of the kitchen and watch them prepare meals together, easily moving around each other and laughing brightly at the things the other would say. Madi busied herself with long distance Queen duties, or speaking with Thomas for what felt like hours, but whenever he got overwhelmed he could go to her, and lay himself in her lap like a cat. And she, like a cat’s master, would lovingly run her hands through his hair and comfort him.

On the second day, Silver was watching them in the garden from the window, when Thomas stumbled, knocking himself into James. He huffed for a moment, but then laughed loudly, freely. He took Thomas into his arms and kissed him, there, bathed in sunlight, the colors of their hair dancing in the light’s reflection.

Silver spent the rest of the day in the guest room, reading some of the many books James had collected.

On the third, Thomas approached him.

“I must apologize for yesterday,” He spoke, holding a hand up when Silver moved to reply. “I will not apologize for kissing my own partner, but I knew you were there, and understand what kind of fragile state you are currently in, it was thoughtless of me. I’m sorry.”

Silver bristled at the mention of fragility, but nodded.

“And…” Thomas continued, more stilted now. “I wanted to tell you…” Silver looked up into those earnest blue eyes. “Whatever you need from James — or _us_ , for that matter —” He breathed, “It will be freely given. What ever it is.”

Silver was left stunned, and a bit confused. Was James’ husband propositioning him? He went to go find Madi.

It was buried in her neck that he finally found the ability to speak.

“I think Thomas hit on me,” he groaned.

Madi burst into laughter.

“Oh, baby, so sad that everyone around you is attracted to you, poor boy,” She teased.

John groaned into her neck. “It’s not that I don’t find him attractive, he’s quite handsome, I just wasn’t expecting him to offer… himself… in that way — we’ve known each other all of three days!”

“How many men are we bringing into the relationship, dear?” She asked, trying not to laugh after every word.

John just shook his head and asked her to stroke his hair. Madi did, continuing to laugh at him.

* * *

Silver couldn’t sleep that night. It was past midnight if he was reading the moon right. Madi was fast asleep, so were the men in the room across from him, presumably. But after hours of tossing and turning, the man got up, taking his crutch. He walked as silently as he could outside, trying to breathe in the clean air. The stars were beautiful that night. He couldn’t see them clearly enough from the porch, so he walked around the side, to a nice area where there was a clearing in the trees, and he could see the moon shine brightly. He spotted Jupiter, he thought at least, and smiled. He breathed, and was rounding the corner to go back inside, when he registered a swinging sound, and an impact on his forehead, and then everything went dark.

* * *

James was panicking. He’d woken up in the middle of the night hearing footsteps outside. Rustling in the undergrowth, and old instincts came back. He’d grabbed a shovel, the easiest weapon to get to at the moment, a good enough blade if needed, and crouched by the door, listening to where the footsteps were. He’d creeped outside pressing himself to the wall. Then the footsteps were coming toward him. He’d readied himself to strike, and then Silver turned the corner. James only had a moment to twist the shovel so that it wouldn’t cleave through the man’s skull, but the impact still dropped the man instantly.

James cursed at himself, dropping the shovel beside his friend’s body. He paused for a moment, surveying the situation and trying to figure out how he could best carry his friend inside. He’d not needed to carry a body for some time now, so the strategy took a moment to come back to him. He decided that “bridal style” would be the best, and scooped the man up, trying not to think about how mortified he would be when he woke. _Never wants help_ , he chided mentally, though he understood profusely.

When he got back inside, Madi was already up, a robe wrapped around herself. She shouted when she saw John, limp in James’ arms, her arms shooting to cover her mouth before running to him.

“Please,” James asked, “He’ll be fine, just a… wrong place wrong time moment, let me just—”

Thomas walked out of their bedroom, rubbing at his eyes. He was mid-yawn when he registered what was happening, and he opened his mouth to speak.

“He is _not_ light!” James barked, before shoving past him and entering the bedroom. He lowered John down as gently as he could, heaving a breath when his load was finally lifted.

“What _happened?!”_ Madi whispered loudly at him. He jumped, not realizing she was right behind him.

“He-” he started, before sighing. “I hit him with a shovel.”

Madi’s eyes flared. “You _what?”_

James couldn’t remember when he’d last seen her so angry. “Hit him with a shovel, it was a misunderstanding, can we _please_ talk about this outside the room?”

Madi turned sharply and marched out of the room, past Thomas who was standing in the doorway.

“Go back to sleep, my love,” James said, holding his hand, “W—”

“I can’t.” Thomas said, making a face.

James’ brows furrowed. “Why not?”

Thomas gestured behind him. James looked.

He had deposited Silver in their bed.

“You kind of put him on my side—”

“I realize that,” James groaned, before leaving the room to follow after Madi.

* * *

When Silver woke, the sun was leaking through the window curtains, rays alighting on his cheekbones. He groaned, and that's when an orange blur shot up beside him.

“Stay down, you might have a concussion,” James spoke, a hand pressing on John’s chest. John’s pupils dilated at his sight and sound, and James tried not to smile, this was a serious situation. “Are you alright?”

John shook his head.

“Fuck.” James turned to reach for something on the bedside table, but Silver caught his shirt in his hand, pulling him back to him. James widened his eyes questioningly.

Silver breathed heavily, before speaking to James for the first time in over a year.

“I’m in love with you.”

James immediately softened, his shoulders relaxing with the stress of the last few hours. He felt his cheeks warm as he dipped his head to smile to himself, moving his hand to hold John’s.

“I’m in love with you too,” He spoke gently. The smile John gave him at those words, he would never forget. John breathed deeply again, relaxing too for the first time in days.

And then he was asleep again.

“Fuck.”

* * *

Silver groaned. His head was pounding, and he moved to clutch at it.

“Madi, I had the strangest dream last ni—”

He wasn't in their bedroom. He wasn’t even in the guest bedroom. He was still in his bedclothes, _Oh God, it was all real_. He began to panic, when suddenly the door opened, and in walked James.

He was holding a tray, and when he saw that John was awake he smiled. “Morning, I hope you, er, slept well.” He chuckled.

John held his hand to his head, and watched James deposit the tray of breakfast on the side table. “What all happened last night?”

James winced.

“ _In my defense_ , I didn’t realize it was you.” He said, before beginning his explanation. “I heard sounds in the night, old instincts kicked in, I grabbed a shovel and went outside. I only realized it was you after I started swinging, I could only twist the handle — You’re lucky I didn’t cleave your head in.”

“Oh, well thank you.”

James laughed, and John joined him gently. 

“A few hours later,” James continued after a moment, “You woke up, and told me… you were in love with me.”

John froze.

“So, of course, I told you I was in love with you too.” James nodded to himself, winding down his explanation. “And then you fell asleep, and now we’re here!” He turned to John.

He was gaping at him. “You…” he stuttered, “You’re… in love with me too?”

James chuckled for a moment before realizing John wasn’t joking. “Yes, John. Did you not hear a word I said the first day you arrived here?”

“I was kind of frozen in panic!” John defended.

“Oh, so scared to come visit?”

“The last time I saw you we almost killed each other!”

“You were trying to stop my war.” James shrugged.

“Oh, so that excuses trying to kill me?”

“To be fair,” James rested a hand on his shoulder and leaned in conspiratorially, “I’ve tried to kill you for less.”

“You… You are a bastard, I can’t believe that I’m in love with you.”

James grinned. Silver could stare at his smile all day, forever.

It was then he registered James’ hand, more on the juncture between his neck and shoulder than purely the latter. And suddenly they were much closer than they were before. And they seemed to come to this conclusion at the same time, eyes flicking to the other’s in sync. John felt his breathing coming harder. James’ eyes flickered down to John’s lips. He breathed, separating them, which made James look again. It was John’s turn to look at James’. He felt James’ hand sliding up his neck, and his breath caught in his chest, and James pulled him closer, slowly. If Silver didn’t want this it was the moment to make it known. 

But he didn’t.

Because he did want it.

And they were so close now, closer than perhaps they had ever been before.

And when their lips finally touched and his eyes flickered shut, John noticed that James’ lips were much softer than the raging orders had ever made them seem.

Kiss is too small a word for what they did.

They pulled back, just for a moment, before James got overwhelmed. He pulled John back to him, not lips to lips for he didn’t want to make the other man panic, but cheek to cheek. He needed to know that John was real, that he was really there, that that had just happened. And John could hear his shaky breaths right in his ear, and felt his own eyes sting before he knew that he was crying. After a moment he was sobbing bodily, and he knew James could hear his breathing, wet and tearful, and he pulled him closer, so scared he would pull away and he would lose him, again.

And James let him cry for a while, just holding him close, pressing their bodies to the other’s as much as they could. 

“I don’t know how I didn’t realize it before,” John whispered, throat tight.

“It’s alright, John,” James soothed, stroking his hair. “You know now.”

They sat there together for a few more minutes before James remembered their food. He moved to reach for the tray, and felt Silver’s fingers clinging to his shirt.

“Come,” He said gently, “You need to eat. I might have given you a concussion.”

The meal was cooled a bit, but they ate it, and James joked that it was probably better than any of the meals they’d ever had on a ship, especially after Silver was in charge of the kitchen. And John laughed, and felt a kind of partnership he hadn’t thought he’d ever feel again.

And James noticed him gazing at him, memorizing his features, and put the tray back slowly, before sitting back down next to the man.

“Do you want to kiss me again?” He asked.

Silver was immediately nodding yes, but stopped himself. “Is… Is this alright with Thomas?” He asked, “And- And Madi? I mean—”

James squeezed his hand, grounding him. He tucked a curl behind Silver’s ear before responding.

“Yes. I doubt Madi would have brought you here otherwise, in addition to what she's spoken about with Thomas and I. And Thomas…” James rolled his eyes fondly, “Well, he thought he made himself clear when he unintentionally told you that he’s on the table as well.” John’s eyebrows shot up for a moment in remembrance, and he flushed. He leaned into James’ hand and let his eyes shutter for a moment.

“You’re safe here, John,” James murmured lowly, “All your thoughts, and wants, and… desires… They are all allowed here. You need only ask for them.”

Their second kiss was very different from their first.

* * *

“It’s been over an hour, Thomas,” Madi pointed out, “Do you think he’s awake, or do you think James is just in there watching him, beating himself up some more?”

Thomas laughed, a laugh that showed his age, the time he spent as a labourer, the intimacy he knew with James telling him she was probably not far off. “There’s only one way to know,” He smiled, laying his cards out face down. “You or me?”

“I’ll go, you stay here,” She said, getting up from the table. “But I’m keeping my cards with me, so you can’t cheat,” She teased.

“Me? Cheat? I would never,” Thomas grinned. She rolled her eyes and went inside the house.

She listened at the door for any sounds, in case they were talking, she didn’t want to intrude. It was silent, though, so she quietly opened the door to peer in.

The sight that met her was not unwelcome, but unexpected.

The two men were fast asleep, heedless of the sun beating down outside. The covers of the bed were tangled all around them, and she could tell what they’d done not just by their state of undress, but also by Silver’s face. She smiled to herself and shut the door again, making her way back out to the porch, where Thomas was definitely not stacking the deck. 

“So? How are they?” He asked, trying halfheartedly to distract her.

She gave him a look, telling him he wouldn’t get away with it as she sat back down. She took the cards and began shuffling them before replying.

“They’re sleeping.”

Thomas stood up, “Oh I hope James isn’t sleeping in that terrible chair, the amount of times—” She grabbed his hand as he went to pass her.

“Don’t worry,” She said, directing him back to his chair, “He’s in bed.”

The loudness of his laughter nearly woke them up.

* * *

Now that Silver was feeling better, they took no time to tease him. Lightheartedly, of course, never an actual serious one. Though he did get incredibly flustered when Madi and James both kissed him on his cheeks at the same time, especially after the implications of their words before.

It was at supper — which they had made all together, easily working with each other like they’d been all together for years — that John asked one of the most important questions of his life.

“Maybe now isn’t the right time, but,” John began, “I was thinking about it and…” He looked up at the others. “How will we continue from here?” He breathed and addressed James, “You know now that I love you, deeply, but… my place is with Madi, I will not abandon her. And yours is with Thomas,” He gestured to the blond, “I could never expect you to leave him for me.”

“I would hope not,” Thomas joked.

James was about to speak when Madi began.

“Actually, Thomas and I have been talking…”

**Author's Note:**

> something something they all move to the maroon island and either live happily ever after or strike up the war again somehow and america is actually okay now historically because it was built with communication and gay people and poc and like they actually werent assholes to the indigenous people
> 
> also i totally forgot how madi speaks so i DONT know if i got her right but i hope so uwu
> 
> anyways please give me all the feedback ever i want every thought you have on this no matter how small  
> you can comment here or u can find me on tumblr @faghalforc


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